What do YOU do that you are not even aware of...yet?

A work colleague once said to me...

'Danielle, you are your own worst enemy.'

I was completely shocked and genuinely baffled by why she might think that.

Sure....I was what I liked to call ....'polite', 'realistic' and 'self competitive' - whatever that meant...?

I dismissed the remark, with my usual apology, for what...I'm not entirely sure, and backed out,

closing the door to the little office, with a guilty demeanor.  

But I had not closed the door to the memory of her flippant, yet well meaning remark. 

The door to my neural pathways had been opened and the wheels churned around in my head,

over and over like rehashed dough in a bocketty old bread mixer.

No one had ever said this to me before. Why would she say such a thing?

My first reaction was one of rising indignation. 

Who did she think she was? Was it not obvious I was just being polite?? 

Was she so perfect, that she thought she could just say something like that to me so bluntly?

And yet......I started to question my flushed emotions. She had triggered a nerve.

Maybe, just maybe she had a point.

I had been in the business of reading people long enough to know there is always some truth in something one takes the time to say. 

I had often had to address issues and habits with people they were unaware they actually had. 

And it always surprised me that they never realized they did these things and often were so utterly shocked, indignant and completely un-receptive to my attempts to convince them otherwise. 

Was I going to be one of them?

Nope. I was good at listening and reading between the lines or straight at them as in this case!

This girl was a very deep thinker, analytical and very smart albeit sometimes maybe a little blunt. 

Although very well meaning she didn't mince her words,  and so I started to think....

maybe, just maybe she had a point, maybe because...she had simply witnessed it!

I realized then very quickly, (I was very open to change at the time and working enthusiastically on my personal development) that she was completely correct of course.

I started to take note of how often I would.....

criticize myself out loud or internally, 

apologize for something utterly unnecessary,

tut at myself, 

or even simply throw my eyes to heaven.

I became aware of the times I did it. 

I didn't judge or criticize myself even further for doing it, 

I just simply became aware of it. 

My mind had expanded. New pathways were being opened. 

I was discovering new things FAST!

Shortly after with the help of my newly discovered NLP techniques, I worked on silencing my self-critical inner voice. 

Six months later, people started to say I had changed. 

Something in me was now very different.

I would simply smile. 

Yes, it was.

For my work colleague... Thank you x 

For more read here..
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/09/the-simple-way-to-success.html

Danielle Serpico

NLP Life Master Practitioner

'We have to learn to be our own best friends, 

because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.' 

Roderick Thorp.

If you want to learn how to silence YOUR Critical Inner Voice

enroll NOW on my NEW 'Be nice or be silent' Workshop,

coming to Dublin this summer (-:

email me TODAY for a place at

neurocombatives@gmail.com

The first 'step' on your journey...

How do you know HOW to take the first step?..

Sometimes our goals and aspirations seem so far away and daunting that we end up never actually getting started. It all just seems too much...too distant...too impossible.

Focusing on your goals, is of course, a very rewarding and pragmatic exercise, as I have said many times. If you don't know your end destination then how do you plan to get there?

Here is more on this...
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/09/the-simple-way-to-success.html

For now let's re-read the previous sentence.
If you don't know your end destination then.... 
how do you PLAN to get there??

Exactly - YOU NEED TO PLAN!
And planning can be a lot easier then you think.
Break it into chunks, one step at a time.....
To get to x ....I need to do Y first ....and so on.

I grew up in Rome and as a little girl the Starlings above my head, swooped and swayed in a magnificent wave above my head, as I giggled delightedly at their wonderful performance.

But I never questioned how did they manage to stay so perfectly in sync..... but many scientists did.

They discovered that instead of prior belief that they all interacted with each other, they each actually kept track of only seven of their feathery friends, thus being much easier to keep up with.
They naturally, instinctively knew that a smaller number was easier to manage, taking in the big picture would probably prove a little too overwhelming.

Maybe, we can do the same?

When we are faced with a seemingly impossible task or we want to reach out and grab hold of those dreams, then simply break it down, into small manageable steps, that individually seem more achievable.

Start with those little steps and the magnificence will follow....

Enjoy the flight.....
Danielle x
Your Mind Coach

P.S: Do you know the 10 Most Common Mistakes people make that sabotage their goals???
I will reveal all and how NOT to fall into these traps & loops
on My 'Life Changing' Weekend RETREAT Workshop CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT MORE! (in  Wexford this January)!
If you want to make the best New Year plan and have a wonderful Christmas in the knowledge that things are about to get so much better....
then email me NOW !!! 
info@theblackbeltmastermind.com

You will truly LOVE your decision (-:

The map is not the territory....

Plato used to say... 
'The objects we perceive are not the ultimate reality, but more like a shadow of reality.' 

He explained this in the following analogy, 'The Cave'.

A group of people, living in an underground cave since they were born, are forced to sit with their backs to the entrance. All they can see is the far wall of the cave. In the mouth of the cave is a large fire, and between the fire and the people’s back parade various creatures, whose shadows are cast by the fire on to the cave wall. 

The prisoners in the cave cannot turn their heads to see the creatures, all they can see are the flickering shadows on the wall in front of them. Since this is all they have ever seen since the day they were born, they presume these shadows are all there is.

Then, one of the prisoners manages to free himself and, looking around, realizes that everything he took to be reality up to now... is but a shadow. 
Outside he finds the true world of color and three-dimensional forms! 

Overjoyed with his discovery, he returns to the group to tell them the wonderful news. But try as he might, he cannot convince them that everything they see are but flickering shadows of the "real world". In the end the other prisoners kill him rather than accept such a nonsensical notion.'

What this means is, that our perception of reality is not reality itself 
but our own version of it, or our "map".

No two people will have entirely the same 'map'. While, most of us have similar neurological structure, it functions differently in each of us. We all use what is called are Subnomalities or our 'senses'. These are made up of Visual (Sight), Auditory (Sound), Kinestetic (Touch & feeling), Gustatory (Taste), and Au-factory (Smell). We use a combination of these senses and often more of our preferred ones, to come to our conclusions of things.

This can be the basis for many of the problems we encounter in our daily lives, when we presume to 'know' something is 'as it is', or trying to impose our 'map' onto another person. 
Learning to recognize the structure of another person's map allows us to more accurately 
"see the world though their eyes" and therefore be able to understand and relate to others on a deeper level.

Remembering this can help us change our old beliefs, therefore often changing our old habits. 

Change your way of thinking and you will change your actions.
Always remember 
'The map is not the territory' 
and your discoveries will be enlightening.

Below is a really interesting article with a cool demonstration on how we sometimes see things differently then the actual reality...
http://whyevolutionistrue.wordpress.com/2011/01/08/do-we-perceive-reality-the-checker-shadow-illusion/

If you want to understand more how the mind works and the link between the conscious and subconscious then lets look at the process in more depth.....(-:

When you develop a thought, it is firstly analyzed by the conscious mind which then sends electro-chemicals to the brain. As the electro-chemicals travel through the brain, neural pathways are opened up and the data passes through. The conscious mind then attaches emotion to the thought based on its 'perceived' interpretation of this data. This increases the vibration of the thought and it is at this time that a belief is created and then stored in the subconscious mind.

This belief may be based on truth, reality, or even a lie. It depends on where the thought came from and how it had been interpreted. It can then be accessed and utilized in the future by the conscious mind, to either support or deny any future thoughts that are inputted into the conscious mind.

When the conscious mind receives this same input again, the subconscious mind will locate and provide the data which was stored previously and then send it back to the conscious mind with an emotion of some type, which was also stored previously with this data. This will create a vibration based on the frequency of the data presented. 

This may result in the creation or manifestation of what that thought was intended to provide. 

So keep in mind (-: if your thoughts are helpful and positive or not.

Remember, the subconscious mind does not know the difference between what is real or imagined. 

It only responds to what is fed to it. 

So for it to work correctly, you must be sure and clear of what you are feeding it, 

if you really want to succeed at creating the life of your dreams....

  
'Everything you can imagine is real'
Pablo Picasso

To all your dreams,

Danielle x
Your Mind Coach
info@theblackbeltmastermind.com
00353(0)863845299
More on this here....
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/08/are-our-boundarys-real-imagined-or.html

Good decision, bad decision...gut decision...

Sometimes we all struggle with making decisions, some big, some very small,but..... how do we come to make them?

If you are struggling with a decision at the moment and feel like you are going around in circles, then maybe...                     not making a decision (at least for a while)
is a good decision!

In fact, you are probably already doing that, at least unconsciously, so how about you let up on yourself a little, give yourself a break and go back to it when you feel more clear headed.

A good way to help with this clarity is to visualise.
Simply take each of the considered scenarios, and visualise what it would be like if you chose that path.
See how it feels and how you react to each one.
Then, probably your 'gut' or 'instinct', will tell you which one to choose.
This is generally the right choice for you.

You see, if the problem is not a logical one, like say...'Will I put petrol in the car as its in the red, before I go on this long journey?' Well, you can probably deduct you will run out and the car will stall, so you clearly know the consequences.
Not all decisions are this logical, so this is when turning it over and over, hoping for the 'correct' answer may never happen. Its down to your gut now... Trust it.

One things for sure, if you don't make any decisions, you are never in control of what happens next and you may never move forward.
The lost important part is that we actually really 'think'. Not fret, stress and worry, getting ourselves all in a muddle, but when we are ready, we really think.
Sometimes the solution is logical and we will figure it out, sometimes its our gut and sometimes its a mixture of the two. I will leave you with this super little tale....

'Many years ago in a small Indian village, a farmer had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a village moneylender. The Moneylender, who was old and cunning, fancied the farmer's beautiful daughter. So he proposed a bargain. He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the proposal.

So the cunning moneylender suggested that they let providence decide the matter.

He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from the bag.

a) If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven.

b) If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven.

c) But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into Jail.

They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field. As they talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the money bag.

The Moneylender, then asked the girl to pick a pebble from the money bag.

Now, imagine that you were standing in the field. 

What would you have done if you were the girl? 

If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?

Careful thought would result in three possibilities:

1. The girl should refuse to take a pebble.

2. The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the money bag 
and expose the moneylender as a cheat.

3. The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order to save her father 
from his debt and imprisonment.

Take a moment to ponder over the story. The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking.

The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking. 

Think of the consequences if she chooses. What would you recommend to the girl to do?

Well, here is what she did ...

'The girl put her hand into the money bag and drew out a pebble. Without Looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble strewn path, where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles.

"Oh, how clumsy of me," she said. "But never mind, if you look into the money bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I picked."

Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had picked the white one. 

And since the moneylender dared not admit his dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one!

So remember, most problems DO have a solution. 
We simply have to think to find it.

To all your wonderful decisions,

Danielle x

00353(0)863845299

neurocombatives@gmail.com
For more on this follow this link
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/07/are-you-sure-you-are-uncertain.html

Are you Toxic?

                                 Are YOU Toxic???

Your 'Thoughts' cause your 'Beliefs' and your beliefs cause your 'Actions'

So.....if your unconscious thinks you cannot handle your fears, 

it will then automatically activate the body’s sympathetic nervous system.

How does it “know” you “cannot handle” your fears? 

Well...our thoughts and beliefs are saying so, right?! TOXIC thoughts!

This is a SUPER article on this here...

http://blogs.psychcentral.com/relationships/2011/08/the-neuroscience-of-changing-toxic-thinking-or-behavior-patterns/

If you want to discover a way to change those Toxic thoughts and get rid of those fears

just contact me at neurocombatives.gmail.com

Thanks for reading,

Danielle Serpico

(NLP Master Practitioner)
For more FREE Advice on this click here http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/

Autopilot, extict or......alive?

Einstein said that  
'If the bee disappeared from the surface of the globe 
then man would have only four years left of life.'

 Here's more on this  http://www.snopes.com/quotes/einstein/bees.asp

My wonder is....are many of us actually truly 'living' as it is?
Or........simply surviving.
Fighting a loosing battle and the daily grind to keep us from extinction for another day.
Avoiding the inevitable, that is already happening if we dare look.
Or... maybe... already happened.

I don't mean to sound glum here! I am simply explaining what I see on a daily basis.
Like drones or something out of a sci-fi movie, we pile into buses and trains or sit bleary eyed staring blankly out over a car steering wheel. We tiredly plod the crowded streets on a mission to our jobs, many of us looking as though we are walking the plank to our watery grave.
 Is that truly living?? 
How many times have you been awakened from your daytime sleep walking by a friend or colleague startling you back to the 'real' world? Where were you just before that moment? 
Probably floating off lazily somewhere else, thinking of the past or a possible future.
What if you were present more often?
How would that affect you?
Do it now and see.
Concentrate fully on this moment, reading this. Keeping the focus on NOW, the PRESENT.
How do you feel right now, while you concentrate on YOU.
I am betting you feel MORE ALERT then you did a few seconds ago. MORE AWAKE.

That's because you are here now, your mind is here, connected with your body, not wandering off somewhere else, leaving your sluggish body to thump around the place on Autopilot, without a real presence in control.
FEEL the DIFFERENCE.
That is living in the present.
That is LIVING (-:

This way us humans will not become extinct before our body's actually do!
And you never know then what might happen,
with our minds on board the ship, what we are actually capable of....

Enjoy the trip of your life,
Danielle x  
NLP Licensed Practitioner and Life Coach.
You can read more on this subject click below...
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/07/make-believe-or-reality.html
Call me for more on 086-3845299 or contact me at neurocombatives@gmail.com

Make contact with the true you....

Reaching out for the real you....

If you are anything like me, and I am pretty sure you have been at some point,
then you will have, at least once in your life not been able to stop your internal voice.

What do I mean by that?

Well, like...me.....

have you allowed that little voice to take over and control you and bring you down the wrong path or take you in circles? Rather then you taking control, reaching out to your true mind and directing your own future?
Have you bought in to this pattern of letting whoever that voice is, real or imaginary, yourself or someone else, talk you out of what you felt was your true gut feeling?
Has it ever felt like a con? Have you had moments for example on the phone or sending a message where you were tact-less or thought someone else was unjustly?
Do you ring your parents often or don't because your little voice is blabbing in your ear about the past?

If like me, you have done this, then you might be interested to know, there is a way to just shut it up or at least turn down the volume on it! Or even make it so...it just makes you laugh!
Does that not sound like a good idea...

Have a look at this for some more info on the subject....
http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/2012/07/badhabits-youre-so-stupid-ugly.html

Imagine a life where you instead make the decision to take back control of the steering wheel and you decide to steer it down a path towards a life of peace, happiness and joy. Sounds good yea!
You are here now for a reason, you have read the above and concurred with some... if not all of above, so by now you know there is a possibility of change and reaching that decisiveness you may strive for.
If you want a life full of you being in control, following your true path, meaningful contact, meaning and purpose then you now know what you could start by doing.....

Call me today at 00353 (0) 863845299
I do appointments face to face, by phone or by Skype.
or email me at neurocombatives@gmail.com

more blogs on http://neurocombatives.blogspot.ie/